On Saturday morning I flew out to LA for a business slash vacation trip.
(I'm still here now...and the myths-busting continues).
As I rolled my super chic Diane von Furstenberg duffcase (see it's like a suitcase but also like a duffle) up to the self check-in counter I felt that twinge I sometimes feel when performing an act my 12-year-old self thought was sooo adult. It's not the common shit-I'm-an-adult-make-it-stop twinge common to starting Turbotax or opening your first Jury Duty slip. It's more a pride-filled, yeeaahh-I'm-doing-it, how-cool-must-I-look-to-all-the-12-year-olds-at-this-airport feeling - like I felt the first time I ever went to a restaurant without any adults or the very first time I drove in the city by myself (this January).
The airport check in experience made think about all the other damn-right-I'm-an-adult moments in my day slash life - an embarrassing and very specific list that I'm really hoping you'll add to in comments sos to validate my crazy. Here they are:
- Renting a car - oh-my-god do I feel cool when I rent a car. I'm like hell-yeah-I-can-be-responsible-for-this-massive-driving-machine-that-isn't-my-own. I'm over 25 and have enough money to cover this rental. Boo yeah!
- Ordering a dirty martini really quickly - when I first started drinking dirty martini's I'd be all, "a martini, please...um, dirty? like the lots-of-olive-juice kind. Oh, and I like it with vodka instead of that other option, and could you please put it in the v-shaped glass with no ice?" Now I'm, "very dirty Kettle martini, up - thanks." Honestly, it felt good even typing that.
- Having house guests - before I moved home to share a room with my 20-year-old sister I commonly welcomed apartment-guests from out-of-town to crash in my mini apartment. They would ask for a spare towel, and I would have one. They would need directions, and I would give them. They would say, "I there a ______ nearby where I can _______?" and I would say, "Yes, there's three of them within walking distance.
- Using acronyms, specifically in business - "I was at the OMD party with some people from GMG talking about the state of the CHC and CPC businesses." If that doesn't sound totally cool and completely grown up, I don't know what does.
- Using Entertainment industry speak - i.e. "Yeah, she's great, but can she push a photo?" or "I hear she's just hip-pocketing her." The key-to-cool here is the risk factor. Say it wrong and you're over.
- Having a business card that doesn't say assistant - When I first got business cards they said "Assistant to the CEO" or "Assistant Sponsorship Account Manager," which is just like, why don't you just print "Under 25, Under-paid" in parentheses. Now I have one with a totally vague title that no one understands. Much cooler.
- Calling important adults by their first names - I am still fully inclined to address an email to a company CEO or president with whom I deal regularly "Dear Mr. _______."
- Understanding what a deductible is - on Saturday my friend Jordan explained what a deductible is as we were hiking up Runyon Canyon. I'm still a leeetle fuzzy, but get it much more than I used to. Next stop, Roth IRA. Abby?
*yes, that is a picture of my 5-year-old self in a belted business-casual blue look with white cherry-printed tights. If that outfit still fit, I'd be wearing it today.